
image is a digital mockup, not a photograph of the printed shirt.
parasite panama.
$37
front: "i pooped a worm." back: "turns out my nervous system had a roommate." this one's for the ones who found out the hard way. no metaphor. no euphemism. just a tuesday you'll never forget. parasite panama. double-sided. bella+canvas 3001. unisex. 100% ring-spun cotton. wear the receipt.
SIZE
QTY
unisex relaxed fit. runs true to size.
bella+canvas 3001. 100% ring-spun cotton. 5.3 oz midweight.
tagless neck label. side-seamed for zero twist.
pre-shrunk. machine wash cold, tumble dry low.
do not iron the print.
we removed the tag before you had to ask.
SIZE CHART, GARMENT MEASURED FLAT
| size | chest width in | length in | chest / length cm |
|---|---|---|---|
| s | 18 | 28 | 45.7 / 71.1 |
| m | 20 | 29 | 50.8 / 73.7 |
| l | 22 | 30 | 55.9 / 76.2 |
| xl | 24 | 31 | 61.0 / 78.7 |
| 2xl | 26 | 32 | 66.0 / 81.3 |
| 3xl | 28 | 33 | 71.1 / 83.8 |
ships within 3–5 business days.
free shipping on orders over $70.
printed to order, then shipped. returns within 30 days, unworn. damaged or misprinted items replaced free, send a photo.
we ship to wherever you're masking.
THE GARMENT
CHEST WIDTH, FLAT
these numbers stay blank until samples are measured in hand. no supplier spec sheets, no guesses.
THE RECEIPT
PATTERN RECOGNIZED
wear the receipt.
parasite panama.
i pooped a worm. (roommate edition)
front: i pooped a worm.
back: turns out my nervous system had a roommate.
$5 of every shirt funds development of the ark project.
no refunds on pattern recognition.
patternrecognized.com
parasite panama.
$37